Separation Coach

A community blog to help people going through break ups, separation or divorce.

Separation Coach - A community blog to help people going through break ups, separation or divorce.

On My Own – After Divorce

Here’s a blog post that a friend of mine wrote called “On My Own”


“A major thing that I have found both tough and rewarding is being a single Dad. “

It is amazing how many things are new and exciting to you after separation. You need to be open to saying yes to those opportunities and accepting those challenges thought…YES that is the hard part :-) Continue reading

Trying To Parent with an Uncooperative Ex? Here Are 5 Tips That May Help.

It doesn’t matter if you are male or female, the mom or the dad role…you may find yourself trying to co-parent with someone that you don’t see eye to eye with.

I’d love to say that there is an easy solution. I can waive my magic wand and your ex will be cooperative and work with you to make good decisions in the best interests of the kids…OR maybe it would be easier for me to just make a movie about it instead.

What people forget is that even if you were still together you and your ex would have disagreed about parenting issues. How you handled them would have been different though.

Without a vested interest in the relationship there is little room for open discussion and compromise. Continue reading

Parenting Plans and Teens…How to Handle Change.

You have been divorced for 6 years. Your parenting plan did an excellent job of identifying when each parent would be the “active” parent and spend time with your kids. It set out how you were going to parent, how you would handle holidays, expenses and how you as parents would make changes to the plan.

Surprise, surprise, your 15 year old has decided that your parenting plan no longer works for him/her. Did you discuss during your separation how you would handle changes that were initiated by your children? Continue reading

Why Is Family Mediation Seen As Negative?

So, I regularly have people say “Oh I am happily married, I would never need your sevices” or “if I take your card or friend you on Facebook someone will think I need your services”.

To these people I have a few questions…

“What if a family member was divorcing, would you rather see them in court losing their savings or privately sorting out their differences?”

“What if you are struggling with your siblings over selling your dad’s house during the process of moving him into a care facility?”

“What if your son/daughter is in a new relationship with a partner that also has children…they are planning on moving in together. How will your grandchildren will be cared for?”

For all of the above situations a Family mediator could be amazingly helpful in creating transition plans and bridging the gaps in communication.

Life is about relationships, making connections, happiness…yes? I have devoted my practice to helping families transition their relationships during a time of stress. It is a very balanced and fair process that lets you stay in control. Staying focused on what really matters and helping you to move forward. What could be more positive than that?

I am divorced and had the unfortunate experience, cost and stress of going through the legal process during my life transition. After 9 years I can honestly say that I can provide a great deal of insight into a parenting plan. Issues that you will face early on in the transition as well as issues that may arise later.

Mediation is part of the solution, not part of the problem.

Having the knowledge that mediation exists may help you, a family member, friend or client in the future. Mediation really is your choice for POSITIVE change.

Parenting Plans …“A Roadmap to Successful Co-Parenting”

Separation is a very difficult and emotional time for many parents, even for those that are amicable. Parenting plans help to guide parents through their parenting responsibilities during a very stressful time; they are the roadmap to a successful future co-parenting.

A parenting plan is a written agreement that identifies all of the arrangements that have been made about how the children will be cared for and supported. A parenting plan can include anything that the parents want to put in the agreement and can be either lengthy and detailed or brief and summarized.
Continue reading