I read a great article (which I’ve attached here) that provides information on this subject.
It is alwasy a struggle for the parents that I coach, my friends and it was a difficult thing for me also. How do you tell them:
- That you are forever changing their lives?
- That they won’t see both of their parents everyday?
- That you still love them and that will never change but the way you feel about Mommy/Daddy changed?
You won’t have all of the answers…that’s ok! Make sure that they know they can ask anything and that you will do your best to get them answers. Make sure they feel loved by both of you.
I have seen parents get sick worrying about how to tell their children. In many cases the children do not respond nearly as bad as the parents worried they would.
It is a grown up issue…children are not equiped to understand the complexities of divorce. That’s a good thing. Your children will be concerned about how this affects them. Will they still live in the same house? Go to the same school? Still see Mommy and Daddy all the time?
I am not trying to minimize what you will go through when you have to sit them down and talk about the divorce. It was a horrible day for me, lots of crying, guilt, frustration and at the end a little bit of relief. I wasn’t carrying that burden around with me. Everything was out in the open and the family in it’s new form could start moving forward with decisions.
However you decide to do it…make sure it works for your family. Keep it as open and postive as you can. You are both still parents and will always be parents, divorced or not. This is the time to start changing your relationship to one of co-parents and not married partners.
You will get through this!
Read the Article now.